If you are developing a player you can do it in ActionScript. If you are using a player like JW Player or Flowplayer you can do it in the HTML container where the rtmp url is set. Add the querystring after the application part, not after the stream name. For example in JW Player 6 you would set the file: to
<html>
<head>
<title>JW Player 6</title>
<script type="text/javascript" src="/jwplayer/jwplayer.js" ></script>
<script>jwplayer.key="[jwplayer-key]"</script>
</head>
<body>
<div id="player">Loading the player...</div>
<script type="text/javascript">
jwplayer("player").setup({
sources: [{
file: "rtmp://[wowza-address]:1935/live?friend1&friend1/tv.stream"
},{
file: "http://[wowza-address]:1935/live?friend&friend1/tv.stream/playlist.m3u8"
}]
});
</script>
</body>
</html>
Richard